i was playing pokemon blue on stream earlier at 350% speed and i got to thinking
what if the reason nobody in the pokemon world has any good teams is because its considered a dick move to have a proper team comp
like culturally everyone is like “haha pick the pokemon you want! if you’re happy with three geodudes, thats you and your life!” and then you’re supposed to just have a friendly battle with any other pokemon trainers and whatever pokemon they just happen to have
like the average trainer is probably just walking around with a growlithe because that’s their pet, or a hiker has three geodudes because the geodudes help him with hiking. and if this pet owner and geodude hiker meet, you’re supposed to have a friendly battle but nothing too serious
now imagine the 10 year old kid that has six pokeballs on their belt comes up. you’re like “haha, we’ll have a friendly battle!” and you throw out your geodude
and they throw out a fucking gyarados, and it one-shots your geodude
and then you throw out your pidgey you have because the pidgey helps you navigate mountains because you’re a hiker
and then electricity crackles around the gyarados and a thunderbolt flies off of this giant dragon and evaporates your pidgey
so you’re down to your last pokemon. you tell them you’re gonna send out your bulbasaur. the ten year old is like “oh okay in that case i’m gonna pull out my vulpix.” like not only is this kid walking around with an amped-up super dragon, but theyve also got multiple pokemon specifically for making type advantage counter-picks?
this kid’s a fucking asshole! really, kid? what are you trying to prove here? this is a friendly match between strangers for fun! why are you composing real-ass competitive teams? what a fucker!
i mean if you look at how npc’s talk about their pokemon, they’re service animals mostly. some of them are just pets. apparently they really enjoy sparring, so you let them battle other people’s pokemon for socialization, it’s like going to the dog park.
hell yes i’d be mad if i took my chronic pain support chow-chow to the dog park and some asshole with four rottweilers and a husky was like SIC EM THUNDERNUTS even if my dog enjoyed the tussle at first.
look, kid, the paras helps me weed the garden. it’s not a special forces attack paras. it’s just a bug that eats dandelions. please calm down.
can u believe some people can see a cat & not immediately be filled with absolute unconditional love for that animal. they dont even get the urge to kiss them right on their little baby cat head. thats incomprehensible to me
my favorite thing about the cask of amontillado meme (which I LOVE) is that it displays, yet again, how difficult millennials on the internet are to predict. oh, giant company, you want your advertisement to go viral? well this week the kids are obsessed with a short story written in 1846 good fucking luck
oh my dear marketing man,you want me to explain how to track this? well, I could show you a chart that indicates the next five big memes. it is down in my basement, though it is quite cold, and surely you have another engagement to attend.
Not to turn mental illness into relatable content but is there anything more hilarious then spending an entire day vamping up to do something like spending ALL day thinking about it and putting it off and dreading it and then you finally, FINALLY do it and it takes 6 seconds and you realize that was your whole day plan
remembering that kakashi was fuckign 26 years old when he got assigned team seven is blowing my mind right now. I was naruto’s age when I got sucked into this shit and now I’m kakashi’s and like,,,I get it. my man got assigned the generation’s WORST of the WORST gremlin children and he did the best he fuckin’ could. he nearly dies on every mission because sasuke refuses to go to anger management and naruto is so dumb he probably can’t even read. he’s got like 7 summons that are dogs and he could be spending all his time with them but is he/?? no. he’s got a sharingan making him so Perpetually Exhausted it’s a straight up medical condition and he has to spend all his free time restraining the two finalists of Konoha’s Next Top Orphan from getting people killed instead of like….teaching them. 26 years old and all that unbelievable bullshit. god. and!! then when he finally gets to take a fucking nap they make him hokage I honestly can’t believe he did it. wasn’t even 30 fucking years old. I can’t believe he didn’t leave the damn village himself.
ok but can you imagine a worse, more terrifying fate than medusa’s one? just imagine. first of all you’re raped in your goddess’ temple. which, apart from the obvious trauma, means you can’t keep doing what you devoted your entire life to. your goddess gifts you with the ability to turn those you look at into stone and your hair into snakes so that you can defend yourself and be a threat rather than a victim to men. and then?????? a fucking MAN decides hes gonna hunt you down and slaughter you for…. sport like just because he can?????? and not only does he kill you but he keeps your head as a weapon???????? effectively using you and your body for his own purpose exactly like your rapist??????????????? like??? and this man is considered a hero while you’ll be remembered as a monstruous, dangerous entity???????????????????? medusa deserved better smh
wow the medusa avenging squad rly is there!!! make some noise ladies
